Rakaman hati yang mendung...

          Entah apa puncanya, hati ini mendung semenjak semalam. Seumpamanya tiada mentari yang menyinari benak hati. Manjadi aku sendiri, menyeka airmata yang entah apa puncanya tiba-tiba berembun di pinggir mata. Aku pura-pura sibuk menatap skrin komputer riba dan menaip. Melihatkan pada dunia yang aku, okay.

Walhal...

         Hari ini, tika aku terlihat mendung di luar, umpamanya hatiku sendiri diperlihatkan kepada dunia. Mendung.

Ku cuba kembalikan keyakinan diri, berzikir mengikut alunan yang berirama di dalam kepala. Allah, aku berserah kepadaMu... hanya padaMu aku serahkan hatiku...

Kau nampak hatiku berlari mengejar pelangi,

Kau biarkan ia bebas sendiri,

Tidak peduli bila ia sebenarnya sunyi,

Jauh dariMu, punca hadirnya sepi.

p/s: Jangan hujan hati. Nanti banjir.

Dilemma...

If only I could turn back time, I would undo all the things I should have not done.

If only I could turn back time, I would do my best in everything.

If only I could turn back time, I would have been millions steps ahead from them.

If only I could turn back time, I would have made my parents proud of my past.

But yet, I can never go back...

It's all done, and had happened.

I'm in dilemma, all my life.

I wanted to erase it all, but how?

Keep blaming myself, and now I feel unmotivated.

I feel like I am the black-sheep of my family.

Though they didn't say so, but I feel ashame of my self.

I could have done better, so I should have been better, now.

I'm sorry for what have I done.

I'll do my best in the future.

Please pray for me...